September 19, 2013

It’s been a week since my last round of Chemo with the new poisonous cocktails and it’s been a hell of a week.  A couple of months ago, I was a full time working Mother.  Sometimes I worked 6 days a week, I always worked on weekends, I made dinner every night for my family.   Now, I don’t do any of those things.  I can’t do any of those things.  I can’t even drive my car.  I can’t carry a basket of laundry downstairs.  My oncologist is now my hairdresser and my meals are nasty Ensure.  I can’t stand for more than 10 minutes at a time before I have to sit down and I get winded with ONE flight of stairs.

As you can imagine, I was a healthy 37 year old, very active, full-time working Mother, who NEVER stopped.  So, to go from one extreme to the other in a matter of months, is traumatic and devastating for not just me,  but my entire family.

I have to stay positive with all of this going on.  I don’t have a choice.  I absolutely have my break down moments, but I have to pick myself up and keep a positive attitude and pray that I get another year, after year, with my family.

The point of this post is to extend my utmost gratitude to the people who have reached out and offered their thoughts, prayers, support and generous offers of meals being delivered, gifts for the children to keep them occupied and even offers to babysit.  We never thought we would ever be in a position to need help, it is so overwhelming.  EVERYONE is so generous.  Our families and extended families and circle of friends are the best!  The Ashland and Natick communities are amazing.  A shout out to the Natick High School Class of 1994, the amazing kids that I graduated with and some I haven’t seen since then, have all reached out to me and extended their thoughts and prayers and generous hearts.  I am just so grateful and will never say that enough.  THANK YOU!

On a positive note, I am slowly feeling better, day by day.  I made it through the week without a blood transfusion or platelets.  I came real close! My next Chemo infusion is October 1st so I am hoping for an uneventful week and a half with no hospital visits.  Fingers crossed!

Lots of love, Jess

One thought on “September 19, 2013

  1. Jess I’m so proud of your strength and more impressed but your recognition of your weakness! We are here for you “whenever you call me,I’ll be there, whenever you need me I’ll be there. I’ll be around!” See you Saturday but if your not up for a visit let me know and I will have Lisa drop off your din din! Xoxo! Keep the hope strong and laugh as often as you can! I love you!

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